She’s Baaaaack…

Told you limits would create creativity. 

While shopping in a department store Friday afternoon, I saw a sign hanging from the ceiling that said “Real Gifts: Real Joy.” I laughed to myself and thought “Oop, that is surely a blog post!”

Material things do not satisfy. We know that. Yet, we see everyone around us pre-occupied this time of year with buying gifts. The more someone gives, the better they feel. The more gifts someone gets the better they feel. When do the feelings stop?

As soon as the giving and getting stops.

We appreciate gifts only for so long. They are new for a minute. When we wear the pajamas, try out the game, play the guitar (or whatever instrument we received), read the book, or whatever we get, it’s not new. Things lose their glimmer. The next year, we have a whole new list of things we want to get.

It’s a cycle.

Should joy be on a cycle?

If joy is a temporal thing, God is a liar. Our joy should be FULL. Not half-there, not fleeting, not temporary joy. FULL joy.

Joy cannot be bought.

Keep that in mind this Christmas.

Any other thoughts on Christmas greed and phony joy?

Romans 8 (and what I’ve learned about the nature of God and the nature of me)

There is something about this chapter that draws me back to it over and over.

1. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3 For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4 in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5 For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6 For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7 For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. 8 Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

9 You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10 But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.

12 So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14 For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. 15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21 that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23 And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 29 For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30 And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33 Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written,

“For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

This whole chapter tells us who we are as Christians. If I ever successfully lead someone to Christ, and they ask “Then what?” I would take them through a study of Romans 8 then Ephesians. Hey, now that my book is in oblivion, I could start writing a study on this…

Anyway. ahem. I’ve come to realize yet again the only way to be genuinely content, happy, and Christ-centered is when I’m not pursuing things I want.

I’ve been learning a lot about prayer recently, too; and the verse about the Holy Spirit making known our requyests without even saying them eloquently makes me want to burst with peace and assurance! Since we are saved to do good works, and we cannot lose our salvation; we should constantly be seeking things above. Sometimes, sin distracts us, though. It doesn’t take much to pull us away from Christ, but sadly, it happens. We become a little more carnally minded than we should. We fall into a great heap of trouble and see no way out. I am so thankful for a God who loves me, but hates my sin with a holy passion! He opens my eyes to breaches in my wall, to echo Nehemiah’s dilemma. I am determined to not let the wall of my fellowship Christ around crumble or be diminished by anything of the Father of lies. 

That’s why I went through this process recently. Christ has become more real to me. I feel light, clean inside and out. Even if you’re not a set-apart “girl,” you warriors could benefit from taking a step back and examining your life, too. We’re all human. We all sin. Princess or Warrior, lady or gent’a'man, I hope you click on the link and take a look at what “Cleaning Out the Sanctuary” really means.  I dare you. Click on it!

Thankful for…

books to read- without them, I wouldn’t be who I am today!

people who are willing to help me and mentor me!

a sense of humor

 praying people

my cat’s fuzzy belly to cry into at night

blogs to visit!

people who keep their word

truth

the ability to ask questions

friends to joke with

my momma!

initiative to get things done

huggers, even if I hate being hugged… they’re good people

Set-Apart-Femininity

the ability to listen as others speak

memories

those few who are careful to not hurt your feelings

(Grateful to God for 17 things and counting)

(I am in a very thankful, happy mood… and I hope to continue this list at random in the coming months)

(Also, I’m planning on posting about two more world religions in the next week)

For Pete’s Sake, STOP IT!

A local requisite for being a weird homeschool family is having a cat to dote on and treat like a real human. To be really weird is to have two cats to treat. We fall into the really weird category, with two spoiled felines. Daisy, the alert hunter, is our more active darling, whom we affectionately call Pablo for no reason at all. 

 Lilly is our spoiled star of the show and the idea that started this post. She thinks she owns the house (literally), tries to teach us tricks. She is also conniving. She sees us coming and runs in front of the walkaway, plops down on her back and purrs to kingdom come. He eyes get big (think Puss in Boots from Shrek 2) and we just HAVE to pet her…

  Lilly, weighing in at over 20-some pounds, likes to think she is a graceful, beautiful kitten who can do anything: jump heights, kill mice (even if they are fake and stuffed with kitty drugs catnip) scale doors, climb walls…

  But she can’t.

Sure, she can trick us humans into giving her hour long brushing sessions, scratching her belly, and painting her claws (she loves that); but we really know she’s just a spoiled animal who knows exactly how to abuse our kindness. She’s cute, but calloused; even-tempered, but rotten; sweet, but selfish. She’s outwardly beautiful, but inside she’s a calculating beast.

Just like us human beings.

    We humans think we can do it all, have it all, BE it all. Only when we let God overpower our desires can we get anything worth doing DONE. We were designed to do good works as Christians, and simply stepping back and letting go can we fully begin to live our lives as REAL, HONEST people. We mess things up, and don’t like to admit it. I don’t know about you, but I hate admitting I’m in the wrong (and hence, you’re in the right, darn it). I dislike apologizing for my hurts to others, because I don’t like to think I can hurt people. But I can, often without realizing it. I don’t enjoy the process of forgiving. For me, grudges are way cooler than asking someone to get over what I did.

But the benefits of doing those hard, unenjoyable things are huge. You feel free. You feel as though you are joyful and easily satisfied with a little instead of a lot.

  We spend a lot of time on appearances. It’s all about confidence and “self esteem”. I occasionally read books my friends are talking about just so I sound informed. I buy 80% of my clothes used and sometimes don’t correct people when they assume I’ve bought my shirt new at AE. I appear to have a perfect life to some people, so much so they push their daughters to be “like” me. I’m often told by adults I’m some type of up-and-coming “great” and it is SO EASY to lean back and say “See what Mrs. Dowelrod just said? I’m going to be great!”

   Looks aren’t everything, and I’ve come to realize that even more throughout the past several months. It’s great that parents use me as a role model, that I can spend little money and still get a decent look, and read thought provoking books. But to abuse that is to become prideful. Power trips are not really what I try for, but sometimes it’s hard to avoid conniving thrills, the enjoyable spoiled attitude, and the fun of attention on occasion.

   Being cute is fun, but living our lives for the purpose of being cute isn’t God highest. Freedom is my favorite thing in the world. When you are free from the image monster, you are responsible for bearing a new image: Christ’s. That’s an image a lot easier to keep up. It’s real. It’s not in your effort.

For Pete’s sake, stop trying to look good. Be good for the glory of Christ.

Free To Be Me?

K Love is a CCM station that doesn’t proclaim itself to be Christian. I find myself listening to it anyway. The music is quite seeker-oriented, which isn’t all bad, but seeking God seems to be a new ‘fad’ among the church. Finding Him and staying put with Him? Not so much.

Anywho, there’s a song that totally goes against God’s word. It’s called Free To be Me

Here are the lyrics, questionable content in bold with commentary at the bottom

At twenty years of age I’m still looking for a dream
A war’s already waged for my destiny
But You’ve already won the battle
And You’ve got great plans for me
Though I can’t always see

(Chorus)
‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender
Got a couple rips in my jeans
Try to fit the pieces together
But perfection is my enemy
On my own I’m so clumsy
But on Your shoulders I can see
I’m free to be me

When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out
My life would turn out right, and I’d make it here somehow
But things don’t always come that easy
And sometimes I would doubt

(Chorus)

And you’re free to be you

Sometimes I believe that I can do anything
Yet other times I think I’ve got nothing good to bring
But You look at my heart and You tell me
That I’ve got all You seek
And it’s easy to believe
Even though cause I got a couple dents in my fender
Got a couple rips in my jeans
Try to fit the pieces together
But perfection is my enemy
On my own I’m so clumsy
But on Your shoulders I can see
I’m free to be me

Lookin’ for a dream? Why should a Christian be following his own pursuits? “Not my will, but thine?” 

Perfection is my enemy? “be perfect, as your Father in Heaven is perfect?” Your Father in Heaven is perfect, so He’s your enemy, apparently. Perhaps she means by herself, perfection is her enemy. Doesn’t quite come across that way.

I’m free to be me? So when you hop on God’s shoulders (which I’ve never heard of doing???), you can be whoever you want to be? Gays could use this song to make their point they were born that way…

I’ve got all You seek? God is SEEKING YOU? Whoa! The Holy Spirit can grab ahold of your heart, but God is as close as you want Him to be… Besides, aren’t we all slaves to the flesh? You’re saying God is seeking us? This song just gets crazier and crazier…

It’s easy to believe? From my experience, I have to think like a little kid sometimes to have faith in God. If it’s easy to believe God is seeking you…

This may sound a l’il weird to some of you who come from a charismatic background. But, if you think about it, what is the theme of the song?

Me. ME.

Yes, the gospel makes us more human. But a song of “praise and worship” like that one leaves me wondering if the worship is of self.

Hmmm…

“I must become less, so He can become great.”

I have nothing against the woman who wrote this song, but her theology could use some Ephesians.

Speaking of theology, I peeked through the Left Behind series the other day. We have three or four sets of the entire series in our church library. Whoa! Those authors assume too much and add very little for Christian- much less the unbeliever who may read them. It’s cool to imagine what will happen, but the theology behind those books is waaaay too warped. I’m glad I haven’t read them. The story looked riveting, but the theology? Read the Bible instead!

INCH

Well, I’m not so flighty after all. I’m actually posting about INCH!

{grin}

Today, I heard a glorious two hours of Leslie Ludy, talking about femininity as it ought to be. Nothing new, but my fading vision for what my future could be was renewed; my perceptions of what I am going to make myself changed.

I’m not going to make myself great.

God will- but only if he chooses.

It’ s alright to dream about some tall, dark, handsome guy to come sweep me off my feet and take me to Israel someday to spread the gospel to the Jews and Arabs living there. It’s alright to dream about making a little house into a home with tons of kids (to help with the demographics). It’s okay to dream about getting a husband smarter than me… though people tell me it won’t happen and a mean little voice in my mind asks me “what if you never marry?????MWHAHAHAHAHAHA.”

 It’s okay to have desires. But God made those desires. He knows them so much better than I do.

Wow.

Who wouldn’t surrender them to God?

But girls, I’ve fallen away from that trust. I haven’t exactly taken the pen out of God’s hand, but I have nearly forgotten about the commitment I made several years ago to live passionately for God every day- including the days of singleness that stretch on unbending in my future.

So I’m going to try again and remember to do live passionately EVERY day. Not just once or twice a week, but EVERY day. I needed that kick in the pants. Or knock on my thick head. Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in doing, not worshipping. I want to bring that feminine mystery back into my life. I can’t imagine how I lost it. Or wanted to.

After two full hours of the true gospel, true beauty, and true feminine grace; I was able to meet and talk with one of the people I look up to in faith… Leslie Ludy. (Apparently, she pronounces it Less-lee instead of what we say- LeZZ-lee) It was a lovely little chat, though it lasted only 3 or 4 minutes. Girls, she really means what she says in her books! You can see how deeply she wants the girls of today to embrace the great faith of yesterday. The gospel, though old, is never changing!

Then, I went to hear Dr. Voddie Baucham, who helped me learn a little more about kids and their attitudes. I’m barely “growned upped”- but I sure forgot how kids act. I needed to hear that. His  Family Discipleship was an applicable lesson on kids and authoritie, the instituions that shape us, and the people who try to tear us down. I highly recommend his “Family Driven Faith.”

I did take notes that session right in my dashboard. Wrong call.

I lost the internet connection, and hence my notes.

Ouch.

After that, I heard several more sessions by the Ludy couple, soaking up all the insights they shared. We talked about what God is to be in our lives (My portion, my redeemer, my maker, my deliverer, my salvation… among 60 and some other things).

After buying the book “Why We’re Not Emergent…by two guys who should be”, I settled into another session with Voddie Baucham. This guys has a sense of humor. He really does.

Whilst making fun of home educators who start school the same day ‘government mass academia institutions’ begin, he yelled out in his BIG, booming voice “Repent!” (clapping) Silence. “If you can’t say amen, you oughta say ouch!”

Tomorrow, I’m gearing up for some Phylicia Duran, some Ludy, some Baucham, and some Phillip Telfer.

Now, I am going to attempt to get what resembles a good night’s sleep.

In a hotel.

I can try…

Useful

When I was a kid, I used to hate crafts. Being the practical person I am, I wondered what cotton-ball sheep had to do with Jesus whilst in second grade Jr. Church. But recently, I realized how fun USEFUL crafts can be. Here are some tutorials and idea spur-ers to spark inspiration in your crafty pursuits…

First, from Phylicia, I got the idea of making “book cards”- using old book pages and pictures to plaster on scrapbook cards.

My mom went to the Sal Army and found a calligraph book, full of some person’s calligraphy; (which I guess was cool in the 50′s!).

49c! My mom got half-off pink tag, so it was 24c.  See how cheap it is to make beautiful USEFUL crafts?

So, you get the idea what that was like…

I liked the idea so much, I had my study group girls make some cards for our activity at our meeting!

This is one card that I made…

I used pictures from an old “Henry Reed’s Journey” book (immense liking for the series when I was a youngin’)

When I was completely done with the card I wrote what papers I had used for it on the back at the bottom…

And then I sent it to a friend!

Since we didn’t have much luck finding sheet music for envelopes, I decided to put my drawing skills to good use (I usually spend several hours on a drawing and end up thinking “what use do I have for this…?” I can’t stand to keep anything without a use around!!). I hauled out my colored pencils and scribbled on the backs of envelopes

Ready to send in the mail…

Sometimes I use a reference photo to copy completely, or to take the main feature and add my own effects, such as below…

\/ Reference photo…

And below is my rendition of it…

Some others I’ve made…

Pillowboxes!

Go to the following link and print out the template: http://www.carolynsstampstore.com/catalog/members/pillow_box_template_small.pdf

Find sturdy cardstock and cut out according to template… as you can see in the bottom right corner below…

Use blunt objects to make creases along the lines, then fold and glue the sides.  (You can find specific directions at http://www.ehow.com/how_4858390_pillow-box.html )

We put colored strips of paper around them that coordinated with the color scheme of the box \/

We cut with a cutting-board to ensure correct lines. You can find them at Hobby Lobby!

Most of my sudden ‘craftiness’ has come from the Homestead Blessings DVDs. I highly recommend the series. It has dairy delights, crafting, sewing, quilting, herbs, and cooking, to name a few. We have them all, and I will most assuredly watch them over and over. I never thought being “domesticated” could be so much fun! What are some projects you’ve done lately?

Next post: Who Taught Them?

Stay At Home Daughter

Part One

  People won’t like the fact you are going to live at home until you marry.

Fact.

Expect their disapproval, but don’t be discouraged by it.

Prepare answers!

  There’s a passel of myths swirling around the church community and abroad, tricking people into thinking our time at home is a time of… laziness. Unless a stay at home daughter is making no contributions to the family household whatsoever, this daughter is not wasting her time at all. People at church grill me almost every week because, well, I’m weird. And weird (to them) means sheltered, narrow-minded, stupid, and maybe even lazy. Some of the questions I’m asked are:

  “Don’t you want to have a life?” “Do you feel like your parents are forcing this on you?” “What about college? Do you mean you aren’t going away?” “Maybe you’re just afraid of the real world.” “Why not move out and get an apartment when you’re graduated?” “What if you’re dad and mom die?” “Maybe your parents are making you do this because they know you’re not ready and are naïve?” “How can you say you like living at home?” “Don’t you want to learn life skills?” “You won’t know what’s new in technology and in the culture if you’re not in it!” “What? You’re graduated/graduating?” “What about socialization?!”

  I’d like to attempt to destroy these myths and give you an idea of how to go about answering similar questions that may be asked of you.

  “Don’t you want to have a life?”

I usually laugh, because I find this question forthright and hilarious. I ask them to define “life” and what “life” entails. Remember: the battle over ideas is a battle over the definition of words- when words lose their meaning, people lose their lives (and debates). Life, to them, is a fun-filled, outing based, social time where a girl spends her single time growing socially, shirking her duties at home. “Life” means that I should not be ‘stuck’ inside a house all day. “Life” is all about me!

  Life, in God’s definition is serving others, learning all I can before some guy steals me from my mom and dad , and getting a grasp on reality: LIFE is not about FUN, is not FAIR, or is of things FRIVOLOUS, nor is it based on crammed social agendas! My mom told me recently that life is not about the next great thing to look forward to: it’s about looking forward to the next thing God tells you to do. How true.

 “Do you feel like your parents are forcing you to do this?”

Not at all. My dad is really one who says “Whatever you do is fine, honey,” in most situations. He would not force me to do anything- unless it is something that I would benefit from, like sticking out a class at a co-op, or when I was younger eating all my veggies. My mom likes loves to see me carry out my convictions and obey the Holy Spirit. She is full of guidance, and is definitely one of my best friends; but I came to discover the idea of Stay at Home Daughterhood by myself, through reading.

 After being at home for so long, they assume your parents have an attachment problem and will not let you go! You can help this by one verbal move; but it is hard to make someone change their mind about you.

Simply speak of your commitments as your own. Don’t say “My dad wants me to wear skirts.” “My mom doesn’t want me to go to this activity.” Make your commitments your own. “I prefer skirts, they are more modest.” “That activity would not benefit me.” This will erase the idea of “bondage” into parents passing on convictions, or a ”teach them to your children” outlook, or even “indoctrination”. Proving the commitments are accepted and fine by your book doesn’t make your parents look like captors.

Suggested resource list-(do in order )

1. Read: So Much More by Anna Sofia and Elizabeth Botkin

Listen to the CD by these girls: Strength and Dignity for Daughters

Watch: Return of The Daughters

2. Joyfully at Home by Jasmine Baucham (I really like this book, I apparently have a lot in common with Jasmine, so it really really hit home for me)

Watch: Dominion Oriented Daughters (Geoffrey Botkin)

~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~

I, again, ask those who are leaving book-long comments meant to stir up rabble rousers for the convention to S-T-O-P.

This is our family’s final year @ Midwest Homeschool Convention (unless they invite Ken Ham next year and allow AiG to display in the exhibition hall…). I’m excited to be going (though bittersweet, because of the grim events happening concerning AiG). I will be posting pictures and notes over the weekend, so be sure to check back!

Guess What Came In The Mail!!

A tan manila envelope with “Soroti Uganda” and then our address. Hmm. It was thick, somewhat heavy and looked quite travelled. Perhaps many hands held it before it left the village, locals wondering who had business in Amerika? I ran up the driveway, anxious to open it.

Staring at the package, I wondered if it was one of my pen-pals from Uganda, dear Jethro, or Carol, or Aunie Lynette. But none of them live in Soroti.

Then it hit me.

Those children from the orphanage wrote thank you letters! I tore it open, excited (okay, I was jumping up and down and screaming “they wrote! they wrote back!!”)

On top was a small card sized envelope with a thank you note from the director:

Dear Friends, Thank you so much for your loving generosity towards the orphans at SOAP. The children will receive countless hours of fun from the items that were sent. Candy is always very much ENJOYED by the children. May the Lord bless you richly… as you have… so lovingly blessed us.”

Underneath it was a note from the missionary we sent the two big boxes to, explaining why it took so long to get the boxes to the children, and why the letters are just now coming. (Turns out, US is not taking much mail from Africa- maybe the Sudan conflict and Libya trouble?)

All of the letters mentioned  the candy (sweets)- and all of the kids thanked our church multiple times and a few asked a specific prayer request for them.

Click on the pictures to make them larger. 

PS~ How do you like the new background? I’m fiddling with it (a lot) so your input and suggestions would help. I discovered I could upload my own backgrounds, and I was getting sick of the aqua (though I love aqua).

For The Sake of Transparency?

For The Sake of Transparency:

Let’s let the emotions run high as we outpour our deepest desires and disappointments in front of the group. Let’s be honest and open and vulnerable to everyone so they can feel and understand our pain. Let’s tell everyone how we got into such a state, and how sorry we feel for ourselves. Let’s rant and rave about the bratty kids we babysit, the goofy husbands we married, and the other annoyances we find so hard to cope with. Let’s share how being a Christian is SOOOOOO hard and not at all like the lovely life you had before you converted. Let’s talk about our defeated feeling and share tips about how to deal with our pride being hurt. LET’S COMPLAIN TIL WE TURN BLUE!!!

And go home feeling… worse than ever, our problems not solved; yet comforted in the fact someone listened to us.

Just let others see through your skin to the real you! It’s okay to cry as long it helps your group “purify” themselves of their guiltiness of not measuring up. It’s okay to drone on to make your point- as long as they see the real you!!! Let’s discuss what that new Christianologist (‘Christian’ psychologist) said about our mind and emotions. It’s okay to veg out and indulge, find time for yourself every day. It’s certainly alright to feel defeated.

THAT’S NORMAL!

If you’ve ever been to a Bible study, youth group girl’s meeting, or a special seminar, you’ll hear that sort of message that “tickles the ears” and leaves you even more bitter and frustrated than before. The idea of being transparent and open and honest for the sake of bragging, complaining, and feeling good is not at all Biblical. God does not command us to tell everyone about ourselves. We should, according to Ephesians, chapter 4- a)speak things that administer grace to the hearers b) speak that which is edifying c) say what we say with love d) speak nothing corrupt. Corrupt here is from the Greek word “sapros” not meaning “dirty” or “bad” as the dictionary says: sapros means not useful, very worthless, not powerful, or even hollow. The idea of being open and honest is a good one, but very easily damaged by selfish motives and Satan.

  When we talk about how our defeat is pulling us down, it may make us seem holier and pious. How Christians began to equate weakness and defeat to spiritual maturity, I have no idea. Christians should not be the ones walking around crying “Woe is me, I have a tinful of problems.” The following is what I wrote in my journal after one experience of a complain fest disguised as a “youth group discussion time”.

  The only thing we studied tonight was narcissism, communication; perhaps even how to justify bitterness at God… I think… that a Christian shouldn’t plan these meetings because they lead to deeper self-worship. “Making time for yourself” isn’t what Christ would ask us to do. I can’t recall Him ever complaining he had no time for himself or that he needed to spend some hours relaxing and getting in touch with His thoughts and desires. As Christians, I also think…we are mirrors. When people look at us and talk to us, the reflection they see should be Jesus. We shan’t talk of all our problems- rather about how God is working through the problems. We shan’t talk about who annoys us- only how we can minister and pray for them. We shan’t gossip, we should keep our mouths shut. The heathen and pagans should see our actions as victory- living evidences that there is a God. A Christian that mumbles about defeat and wants to make time for herself is not a witness.

Christians- triumph! We can’t do anything, including getting the victory over trials, unless we pray. Life would be a bunch of complaining and selfishness if we didn’t live for Him. Stop living like He doesn’t exist: surrender your entire self to Him: your body, your mind, your actions, your thoughts, your words.

 Maybe leave that Bible study, too.

And start your own- with the purpose of growing, not griping.